Ever watched the show Stargate?
I love sci-fi and right now I am re-watching a show called Stargate Atlantis.
If you don’t know, a Stargate is a device that let’s humans (or aliens) travel to different parts of the universe over long distances through “wormhole” connections.
To other galaxies even!
More or less if you don’t like a planet you are on, you can Stargate to another until you find one that you do.
You can “gate” to a planet that is warmer, cooler, more arid, more jungle-like – whatever you want.
As long as you know your destination.
What the heck does this have to do with being more confident and having the life you want as a man?
Well, it’s a metaphor that has to do with being a different version of yourself.
The confident man you WANT to be.
Your currently socially awkward and overly shy and nervous self is just one particular “planet.”
It’s at one Stargate.
And there are many possible selves (planets) that you can be, all created by your beliefs and thoughts you’ve been conditioned in up to this point.
That you’ve practiced over and over as if it was reality, but it’s just your particular version of reality.
It’s not reality, per say.
This is VERY important to understand.
In fact, there is no one self. We all have different selves when we interact with different people like our parents, our siblings, people we don’t know, our co-workers, bosses, attractive women, etc.
However, in order to dial a Stargate to a new planet, you have to know two things
1) Where you want to go
2) How to operate the “gate”.
To operate it you have to know how to “dial” with a special sequence of characters.
You can’t get there without knowing how to do these two things.
The same goes for leaving behind your self that’s suffering with shyness and social anxiety, and creating a confident self as your baseline.
You have to know what you want that new self to look like (the planet you want to Stargate to) and you have to know what to do in terms of shaping that self via the right understanding and methods (how to dial the Stargate).
Have you sat down and done the work to figure out who it is that you want to be?
(Sit down and write it out, in the most positive way that you can.)
Have you been practicing being this new version of yourself?
(Meditation, visualization, self-love/acceptance, belief-change work, etc)
What are you DOING to change?
And are you doing something everyday or only once in a while?
Repetition and consistency are KEY.
If you want to crack the Stargate code of being your best self, that is.
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