How do you know you’ve overcome your social anxiety?

This is a very, very important question.

If you think you should never think any thoughts of social anxiety again, that they’ll be completely eradicated, then I’m willing to bet you’re defining your recovery in a way that will only lead to self-defeat.

You have a perfectionist view of what recovery should look like: to never feel any social anxiety again.

That’s just way too much pressure you’re putting on yourself, and that perfectionism is definitely part of the problem.

It is all part of the social anxiety mindset.

I certainly have those old social anxiety thoughts creep up at times, and even get caught up in that old, ghost of a mindset.

Then I wake up and say “what the $#?L was that?  I don’t have to listen to that garbage anymore.  What am I doing?”

More in today’s vlog on that here, and more.

Thanks for watching this video and please leave a comment below on your experience with this phenomena below this post, and what you think about it. I want to hear from you as part of this community.


    7 replies to "Don’t Get Trapped In “Ghost Mind” During or After Recovery"

    • Kevin

      I experienced Goast mind today and knowing that I can be grateful for this natural part of recovery just feels good.

    • Liz

      I have found this totally true. I needed to become more aware first-then I was able to accept that I had this anxiety and did not have to buy into it. As I became more aware, I was able to accept the anxiety more and act in spite of it and eventually the anxiety dramatically lessened . I think how you describe it as a ghost is a good metaphor because the anxiety does come up on occasion, but is only a shadow of what it was.

      • David Hamilton

        Yes Liz, you are a powerful example of doing the actions of confidence and not worrying about how you feel. You are more concerned about what you want to do in life, rather than let anxiety hold you back. I have been amazed time and time again in working with you how you are truly fearless. Being truly fearless is to act in spite of fear and anxiety, there is no fearless without fear.

    • RC

      Great video. I especially liked the part where you referred to social anxiety as a condition rather than a disorder, and that a person with social anxiety should be encouraged to “shift” rather then be “fixed”. This is a very pro-active way of looking at it, and also makes recovery seem much more possible and attainable. Thanks for your words.

      • David Hamilton

        Yes I think it’s an important reframe to look in terms of condition instead of disorder, and I’m glad you get that. You’re welcome, and thank you for your comment!

        • Jess

          I completely agree with your point of not calling it a disorder .I myself have been calling it or thinking it as something that I have a tendency towards or something that I get or you know that I have anxiety and certain situations but Not a disorder. After discovering I had this condition it made it so much worse to think of it as a disorder and I felt doomed, so I really appreciate you acknowledging that it’s more of a tendency or condition it’s not a life sentence.

          • David Hamilton

            So great to hear that you’ve been seeing social anxiety in this light…as not dooming yourself to a life sentence. It also doesn’t mean something is wrong with you fundamentally, which some may have you below. Welcome to the community here Jess, really glad you are participating and being a leader here, in showing others that read Social Expression, that sharing is safe to do.

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