Yeah, I’ve felt that often in my life – way TOO often.
And sometimes we have to look at failure in order to find out what prevents us from success.
It isn’t always pretty.
I’ve failed A LOT. There are times I wanted to quit on the road to confidence, and many things in life and just let shyness and social anxiety rule my life.
There are still things I’m working on, and I even hired a coach just this week to help me with something that I was a bit frustrated around in my lifestyle.
Now, it’s something I could take care of on my own, but would take me a lot longer probably and maybe I’d even miss some important things.
But with his help and guidance, I knew I could accelerate the process and quickstep past failures and faster into success than I could do on my own, by knowing what works.
And it’s good to know what NOT to do, on the road to success too.
Here’s a little list I came up with of things that will ensure failure if you do them, which means you should NOT do them!
1. Just giving up.
This is all too common. Thinking there’s no hope, no way, you’re SO different than everyone else (even with social anxiety) etc. You have to be the #1 believer in yourself no matter how hard it is.
You have to reach deep down inside even when you want to give up, and say “NO! This is what I want.” Instead of settling for what you don’t want.
2. Not taking the pressure off yourself to get results.
Also known as outcome indifference. By taking off the pressure to get a result or outcome, you actually can make it happen faster.
Though it sounds Zen, it is fully true in my experience of doing this kind of work for 10+ years. This happens when working with the mind, especially. It’s like the little kid in the car asking “are we there yet?” over and over again.
It’s like when you have cut yourself and you’ve put a bandaid over the cut but you keep pulling off the bandaid to check if the wound has healed every 45 seconds, which reopens the wound – it slows or stops the healing completely.
DON’T DO THIS. It will slow or even stop up your progress completely – some of which have been my clients if they don’t listen to me on this. Said another way – trust the process and be consistent with your efforts as possible.
3. Not taking action to apply what you learn – or in getting help
If you’ve been reading my blog posts, been watching my YouTube videos (you should be watching ALL of them BTW) – and not doing everything you can to apply them, let alone other books, courses, etc you’ve bought then what in the heck are you doing?
Do you think that a little email hit each day to make you feel good for just a moment, but then “reality” sets in, and you aren’t doing anything to help yourself?
Look, I get it if you are new or are in a tough place. But at some point you have to start taking action.
The same goes for when you have been trying and applying but just feel stuck. Getting some professional help can be a great road to take.
Though it’s an investment, it’s an investment in your life, which BTW is priceless. That’s just how I see it. I’ve paid for a lot of professional help over the years and still do. I’ve learned it’s what the most successful people do, too.
So there you have it.
Three ways to ensure failure. Said another way, flip those over and do the positive opposite, and you’ll be on a much better path to success.